This video is sort of a subtweet about some art twitter discourse. But I wanted to respond in video form rather than in written form so that you wouldn't misinterpret my words. Also not linking the discourse directly because I don't want to dogpile on the inspiration for my thoughts. But here are three ideas that I wanted to share with artists for us to keep in our brains as we go into the new year.
Stage Names
February 27, 2019
Gonna be a busy week which you can probably tell from the lateness of this update. Hopefully, I can get around to toning, but if I don't, please know that it's mostly because I've got lots of projects in the queue that are piling up. And half of them I'm getting paid for! Which is better than usual.
What would your stage name be? I keep trying to think of something clever, but I end up with literal shit like Big Dick Dale or Massive Johnson.
LANCE
Let me introduce you to the gang.
====
LANCE
Jack Hammer. Which is actually his legal name.
JACK
It?s like I was born for this job.
====
LANCE
The ?Viking Virgin Slayer,? Steve Stevenson!
STEVE
He?s the only one who calls me that.
====
LANCE
This is Eddy? uh? do you even have a stage name?
EDDY
He tried Eddy Hung ?Like a Horse? and Eddy ?Well? Hung but I told him to stop being racist.
LANCE
Your ancestors used that last name for a reason! Dishonor! Dishonor on your cow!
====
LANCE
This is Joey Steel.
JOEY
For my steely gaze! I actually like that one!
====
LANCE
This is Lana, our director. And Elly, our DP, camera operator, editor, color grader, effects department.
ELLY
I shoot weddings, too, but like, there are so few punches. Gets boring after a while.
====
LANA
Hey, Julie, thanks for coming in to help us out.
JULIE
Oh, no problem. As long as I don?t have to see Lance naked, I?m good to go.
====
LANA
Actually, we were thinking with the compressed schedule and all that we?d like to shoot the easy stuff today and work out the fighting the rest of the week. You know, just in case one of these dumb dumbs hurts themselves.
JULIE
Easy stuff?
====
ELLY
The boning.
JULIE
Dammit, Lance!
LANCE
Let me introduce you to the gang.
====
LANCE
Jack Hammer. Which is actually his legal name.
JACK
It?s like I was born for this job.
====
LANCE
The ?Viking Virgin Slayer,? Steve Stevenson!
STEVE
He?s the only one who calls me that.
====
LANCE
This is Eddy? uh? do you even have a stage name?
EDDY
He tried Eddy Hung ?Like a Horse? and Eddy ?Well? Hung but I told him to stop being racist.
LANCE
Your ancestors used that last name for a reason! Dishonor! Dishonor on your cow!
====
LANCE
This is Joey Steel.
JOEY
For my steely gaze! I actually like that one!
====
LANCE
This is Lana, our director. And Elly, our DP, camera operator, editor, color grader, effects department.
ELLY
I shoot weddings, too, but like, there are so few punches. Gets boring after a while.
====
LANA
Hey, Julie, thanks for coming in to help us out.
JULIE
Oh, no problem. As long as I don?t have to see Lance naked, I?m good to go.
====
LANA
Actually, we were thinking with the compressed schedule and all that we?d like to shoot the easy stuff today and work out the fighting the rest of the week. You know, just in case one of these dumb dumbs hurts themselves.
JULIE
Easy stuff?
====
ELLY
The boning.
JULIE
Dammit, Lance!