Stage Names

February 27, 2019

COMIC TALK
TRANSCRIPT
COMMENTS
Stage Names
Posted February 27, 2019 at 01:34 am

Gonna be a busy week which you can probably tell from the lateness of this update. Hopefully, I can get around to toning, but if I don't, please know that it's mostly because I've got lots of projects in the queue that are piling up. And half of them I'm getting paid for! Which is better than usual.

What would your stage name be? I keep trying to think of something clever, but I end up with literal shit like Big Dick Dale or Massive Johnson.

LANCE

Let me introduce you to the gang.

====


LANCE

Jack Hammer. Which is actually his legal name.


JACK

It?s like I was born for this job.

====


LANCE

The ?Viking Virgin Slayer,? Steve Stevenson!


STEVE

He?s the only one who calls me that.

====


LANCE

This is Eddy? uh? do you even have a stage name?


EDDY

He tried Eddy Hung ?Like a Horse? and Eddy ?Well? Hung but I told him to stop being racist.


LANCE

Your ancestors used that last name for a reason! Dishonor! Dishonor on your cow!

====


LANCE

This is Joey Steel.


JOEY

For my steely gaze! I actually like that one!

====


LANCE

This is Lana, our director. And Elly, our DP, camera operator, editor, color grader, effects department.


ELLY

I shoot weddings, too, but like, there are so few punches. Gets boring after a while.

====


LANA

Hey, Julie, thanks for coming in to help us out.


JULIE

Oh, no problem. As long as I don?t have to see Lance naked, I?m good to go.

====


LANA

Actually, we were thinking with the compressed schedule and all that we?d like to shoot the easy stuff today and work out the fighting the rest of the week. You know, just in case one of these dumb dumbs hurts themselves.


JULIE

Easy stuff?

====


ELLY

The boning.


JULIE

Dammit, Lance!

LANCE

Let me introduce you to the gang.

====


LANCE

Jack Hammer. Which is actually his legal name.


JACK

It?s like I was born for this job.

====


LANCE

The ?Viking Virgin Slayer,? Steve Stevenson!


STEVE

He?s the only one who calls me that.

====


LANCE

This is Eddy? uh? do you even have a stage name?


EDDY

He tried Eddy Hung ?Like a Horse? and Eddy ?Well? Hung but I told him to stop being racist.


LANCE

Your ancestors used that last name for a reason! Dishonor! Dishonor on your cow!

====


LANCE

This is Joey Steel.


JOEY

For my steely gaze! I actually like that one!

====


LANCE

This is Lana, our director. And Elly, our DP, camera operator, editor, color grader, effects department.


ELLY

I shoot weddings, too, but like, there are so few punches. Gets boring after a while.

====


LANA

Hey, Julie, thanks for coming in to help us out.


JULIE

Oh, no problem. As long as I don?t have to see Lance naked, I?m good to go.

====


LANA

Actually, we were thinking with the compressed schedule and all that we?d like to shoot the easy stuff today and work out the fighting the rest of the week. You know, just in case one of these dumb dumbs hurts themselves.


JULIE

Easy stuff?

====


ELLY

The boning.


JULIE

Dammit, Lance!

Comments

Yellow Peril Blog
Posted September 18, 2020 at 12:45 pm

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So check it out. This is not sponsored, but I had fun with it and I think you will, too!